Bedtimes–Vital Family Culture

I’ve been thinking a lot about something said in the “Mentoring the Hero Generation” class I attended at the TJED Forum. Kent Bowlers talked about how as they gathered their family each night for family prayer it usually took them 45 minutes. WOW, I thought, that is a long time. He then went on to explain that it was a part of their family culture, and a vital part.

As I thought more about it I realized that 45 minutes actually isn’t that uncommon at our house. We had just been looking at it the wrong way.

In the April 2012 Ensign article, “Taking Time to Talk and Listen” by Rosemary M. Wixom, she quotes President Faust:

“One of the main problem in families today is that we spend less and less time together . . . Time together is precious time-time needed to talk, to listen, to encourage, and to show how to do things” – President James E. Faust (“Enriching Family Life,” Ensign, May 1983)

This reminded me of how much I have really come to enjoy our family gathering time in the evenings as I have changed my mindset from one of – “come on, hurry up, sit down, pay attention, stop goofing off, let’s read scriptures, it’s already late, past your bedtime” to and calm and relaxed attitude of “ We are all here together, isn’t this wonderful that we all can cuddle, and play, and talk about our day, read family scriptures, and pray together.”

Sister Wixom goes on to remind us that “Bedtime is a perfect time to talk.” I’ve spent years trying to rush my little ones off to bed so I could have some “ME” time, but I know in my heart that it would be so much better to spend the few extra minutes talking to them and enjoying bedtime, than the opposite fight at the end of the day to get them to stay in bed. The frustration caused and extra time spend doesn’t help my peace of mind – or theirs. Its time for a cultural change in our home to a more relaxed and loving bedtime routine for the whole family.

I’ll end with this quote from the same article, “Parents, talk about an interest of your child. Laugh about the past—and dream about the future. Silly conversation can even unfold into a meaningful discussion.”  What a great reminder to enjoy the silliness of children, and to allow the time for the meaningful discussion to come. We can create the family culture that we desire in our house, and evening are the time for inspiring our families, that takes time, so we must give it the time that it requires.

Not So Perfect ( but Progressing) Scripture Reading

Our daily family scripture reading isn't perfect, it kind of moves in cycles. We are fairly consistent about reading, but some weeks and months we just listen (or try to) Daddy read outloud. Sometimes, we all manage to open our own scriptures and follow along, sometimes we each take turns reading a verse or more. When things are really going well, not only do we all follow along and take turns reading, but we also have a discussion and really study and learn together.

I recognize the fact that we would never get to have the amazingly spiritual days when we just look at our kids and say, "Wow", if we didn't have the opposition of the "not so perfect" days. It's difficult to be at the height of spiritual family scripture studies with 5 kids, two of whom are non-readers, but even on the really bad days I take comfort in the fact that we are following the counsel of the prophets by reading the Book of Mormon and that we are instilling a vital habit, and providing the opportunity for testimonies to grow.

I love this quote by President Marion G. Romney

“I feel certain that if, in our homes, parents will read from the Book of Mormon prayerfully and regularly, both by themselves and with their children, the spirit of that great book will come to permeate our homes and all who dwell therein. The spirit of reverence will increase; mutual respect and consideration for each other will grow. The spirit of contention will depart. Parents will counsel their children in greater love and wisdom. Children will be more responsive and submissive to the counsel of their parents. Righteousness will increase. Faith, hope, and charity—the pure love of Christ—will abound in our homes and lives, bringing in their wake peace, joy, and happiness” (in Conference Report, Apr. 1980, 90; or Ensign, May 1980, 67). (“Lesson 16: Family Prayer, Family Scripture Study, and Family Home Evening,” Marriage and Family Relations Instructor’s Manual, 79)

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My Other Book of Mormon Posts.

Family Scripture Reading Posts by other bloggers.

Gospel Art Family Scripture Study by Becoming LDS

We Believe: Family Scripture Study by Mormon Women

How to Make family scripture study fun, interesting - LDS Church News

Sewing is Sew Sew Fun!

A few months ago I received an email announcing that Karalee was offering sewing classes this summer and I signed my daughters up right away. I knew that Rebecca would be interested because her “TALENT” at the Stake Talent show the last 2 years has involved sewing.

Rebecca made and nighttime ensemble for her American Girl doll Sariah. The ensemble includes PJ’s, a blanket, an mattress, and a pillow. Also pictured is Emily’s doll, Emily.

Rebecca models the dress that she made for the talent show in 2009. She received many compliments and wistful comments that they wished more girls learned how to sew today.

Emily was excited to take a sewing class also. Being the jealous Mom that I am I decided to ask if I could participate in the class also. I explained that I already knew how to sew but would like to get some help on zippers and hems. I was excited to be invited to join my girls in taking their sewing class. I’m sew glad that I did too.

Rebecca, Emily and I showed up for class the first day loaded down with 3 sewing machines, patterns, fabric, and iron and lots of enthusiasm. I got some great tips on how to put a zipper in and even got to practice on some scrap fabric Karalee told us that most of the work of the sewing project is in the cutting out, but that most of the problems can be eliminated if you make sure you cut your pattern out accurately. I am humbled to say that learned a lot about the importance of not trying to take “shortcuts” in my cutting that often have resulted in problems later on. After two hours of listening to Karalee explain to us how to rip fabric to make sure it is straight, how important it is to cut the pattern accurately, and the necessity of ironing as you go along ( although, we didn’t iron our pattern pieces) both girls had their skirts cut out.

Our second day of class we got down to the business of sewing. The girls got to practice going straight, doing zig zags, finishing edges, and finally they got to sew the side seams in their skirts. I was glad that there was just the three of us in the class because we got a lot of individual attention, and I knew enough to be able to help out my girls part of the time.

As we were sewing we also discussed our family tree and determined that we were both related to Wilford Woodruff through his wife Sarah Brown. I also was able to begin to explain why I wanted to be part of the sewing class. I explained it as being part of our HOPE CHEST JOURNEY. The Hope Chest Journey was conceptualized from history by Donna Goff and is about preparing daughters to become wives and mother’s. I love how Donna says this,

“All the while she was preparing her hope chest, the women in her life were preparing her, chatting as they worked, passing along a large body of knowledge and skill, incidentally, from one generation to the next, and building bonds of community support, kinship, and sisterhood. These young girls learned about relationships, parenting, family life, recipes, home nursing, and so much more, through listening to and participating in conversations with the women in their lives. Many of the women in this community were informally helping the young girl to prepare to become the queen of her future home.”

I hadn’t even told me girls about the Hope Chest Journey, they got their introduction to it as they listened to me explain it to Karalee.

We have however, already begun our journey, we just didn’t have a name for it. In 2004 I invited my Grandmother to teach my kids to sew. We began with making cute little stuffed animals out of felt and plastic canvas designs. At this time Emily was 5, Rebecca was 6.5, and Isaac was 3.5. They loved having Great Grandma Glasgow come over every Tuesday morning for sewing lessons. Believe it or not, but they all sat quietly at the table and sewed for almost 2 hours each week.

The kids all chose to give Bonnie and Tyler an animal for their wedding present.

The following summer we looked forward to sewing with Grandma again. This year we progressed onto embroidery, and Rebecca (as the eldest(7.5) started on an embroidered pillowcase. Grandma was making one, and Rebecca was making a a matching one. Unfortunately, this perfect example of a hope chest item remains unfinished, because Grandma passed away that November. We have fond memories of our times sewing with Grandma, and my only regret is that I didn’t document the stories that she told us those 2 summers as we sewed together.

And now back to our sewing class. It took us several extra hours on Thursday to finish up the girls skirts, but Karalee hung in their with us and we finally got them done. The girls outdid themselves. I was worried that after 2 hours they would have had enough of sewing each day, but they hung in their and were still happy and energetic and the end of a four hour session. I should have remembered how good they did all those years ago with Grandma and I wouldn’t have worried. Karalee said she was impressed with how happy and fun to work with the girls were. They also enjoyed working with her and telling her all about their American Girl dolls ( who came to class as well).

As I was quietly working on my own projects I was thinking about all the different lessons that could be learned from sewing, like how the little things do matter, how to be patient, to do it right, or do it again, so that in the end you have a product that you are happy with and enjoy wearing, the importance of modesty and beauty, the joy of wearing something that you chose and made yourself. The girls asked me if sewing was cheaper than buying clothes and and we had a discussion about cost and “fair trade” items, but I didn’t even factor in all the other little lessons, traditions, and love that sewing stitches right into the clothing that we wear.

This is just another step on our Hope Chest Journey, and hopefully only the first of many sewing classes that we take from Karalee, because I know I learned a lot, and I hope that my girls did also, and it wasn’t all about stitching.

Laughter Really is the Best Medicine

Our Sunday evening traditions usually find us planning games as a family. I don't often get to play however, as I am the one tending to the little kids. However, this week we played Family Fun with my parents. I love this game because even it is an interactive game that doesn't require a lot of continual focus or card holding and I can play even if I am busy with the baby.

Tonight my parents were playing with us and we were first entertained as Rebecca and Emily had to sit down on the floor back to back and try to stand up without using their hands, and without their frogs falling off of their head. I wish that I had my video camera, it was so much fun to watch them struggle, and laugh, and except that they had tried, but failed.

Next we got to watch Isaac attempt what my Mom said was impossible, laying down on the floor, putting a cube on his forhead, and standing up without dropping the cube. It only took Isaac 2 tries and he succeeded! Woo Hoo, Way to Go Isaac. Again, I wish I had my camera.

However, the funniest part of the night was when Brad had to hum a tune and try to get his teammates to guess it. Both Rebecca and I had read the card, (I had to decide if Isaac would know the song to hum it, or if he should just try to guess.) As Brad opened his mouth (or closed it) to begin humming my Dad shouted out, "The Star Spangled Banner" Rebecca and I were both amazed, I started laughing, while Rebecca shouted "What?" Dad was right, and Brad hadn't even hummed a note. My Dad started laughing, and laughter is mighty contagious. It was so funny, I was crying. It was probably a good minute or so before we got ourselves under control and could go on with the game. I don't think we ever really even asked Dad how he came up with that answer, just a wild guess, I assume.

Brad and I were reviewing the events of the day and we had to laugh again at how much we had laughed before. I have now gotten at least 2 great workouts out of my Dad's confident (yet premature answer), "The Star Spangled Banner." Brad said he was worried that Dad was going to fall out of the chair, or "croak" right then and their. Blessedly, that is not the case, and as we continue to laugh as a family we will keep his heart in good shape. Laughter is one of the best Glasgow Family Traditions!

Mess or Bliss

I walked into this room and my instinctive thought was - "What a mess!"

Then I sat down in the rocking chair, nursed my baby, listened to The Forgotten Carols CD, and had my husband turn of all the bright lights. As I sat there an relaxed I paid more attention to what I was looking at.

Isn't that a beautiful Christmas Tree that the kids decorated?



And here are the scriptures that we just finished reading before they went off to bed. Not only are we reading the Book of Mormon, but for Christmas we are following the advent calendar in the December 2008 Friend (as suggested, organized, and orchestrated by Rebecca).

Here is evidence that we went to Deseret Book to do our Secret Santa Christmas Shopping tonight. The kids willing spent their own money that they have been saving for several months to buy presents for each other, they weren't stingy either.

Beauty really is in the eye of the beholder.

Eating with Harry Potter

My Dad started a new tradition last Fast Sunday, Ok, maybe he just modified that tradition. We have been gathering for dinner with everyone that could make it for dinner for years. Last month Dad suggested that we come up with a monthly theme for the dinner, so last month it was Chinese. The best part was, I didn't have to cook, the boys really got into it and my brother made orange chicken, and Brad made the fried rice. Dad said we was bringing the chopsticks, and he did, along with Pork and Seeds and fortune cookies. Malinda brought some sort of a dessert, called ? Another interesting think about this meal was the the kids weren't the only ones that had to try something new, and everyone actually liked most of the food. Ok, the mustard was hot, or not, depending on your tastes and the dessert was, edible, soggy biscuits cooked in coconut milk. Ok, so nobody really liked the dessert, except maybe Malinda, but we ate it and didn't complain and got to understand how it is to be a kid again.

The theme idea was a hit and we decided on England (the home of Harry Potter) for next month, and the Scandinavia Countries for the first of the year so that we can have rosettes.

I claimed the privilege of making butterbeer, because I had just heard of a couple of good butterbeer recipes on the Mormon Mom Cast which is one of my favorite podcasts. I don't know that we will be repeating treacle fudge however.